It’s taken me a good portion of my life to accept that I wasn’t destined be like other people, always floating on the peripheries of social situations never quite knowing what to say and just feeling hugely awkward in my own skin.
I tried so hard to blend in, to be like everyone else and likeable, so desperately wanting to be popular and pretty and cool.
Yet, it never quite happened and do you know what? I’m glad it didn’t.
Why? I hear you ask, well I think I’d be a pretty boring person now if I was the popular kid in school.
My awkwardness, shyness and weirdness just meant that I focused on what interested me and I didn’t just follow the crowd because that’s what I *should* be doing.
I got to cultivate my creativity, my tenacity and my empathy instead of being bland and popular.
Yet, I pulled away from what truly excited me and what made me tick for so long because I always viewed it as ‘bad’ or something that I should ignore to fit into everyday life, but I felt truly miserable doing so.
In my later adult life not my 30s as everyone claims but in fact the big 40, I found comfort and ease with who I was and in fact saw my own set of skills and traits not as a hindrance but actually a great gift.
I had to really dig deep to figure out what I felt fully aligned with and what held importance for me. That’s when I began to realise that I wanted to move into a career that felt rewarding, where I could help others be their true selves and experience life in all its weird glory being proud of who they truly were.
Without my awkwardness, my empathy and my love of bright colours and bad jokes, I wouldn’t be me and I probably wouldn’t be doing what I’m doing now.
I always say that I live life backwards, I now feel confident and able to do many of the things that I wished I had done when I was younger, but was too scared to do so. Dying my hair pink and purple and performing aerial routines in showcases to name a few.
It’s never too late to be weirdly, wonderfully you!